Sanity... a thing of the past!
there is this one day that comes every year. In which consideration and patience are pushed aside for the betterment of the cause. That day is the infamous "day after Thanksgiving shopping". Anyone and everyone (including those not mentioned) are out on this day making complete fools of themselves to get the best early bird deals out there. i can tell you this because as a daughter of one of these "people" i am an experienced pro of dodging and ducking away from these animals.
Here are some rules and guidelines that can be applied when shopping on this day and this day alone :
WARNING: some actions may be punishable by penalty of law
1. It becomes ok to wait in line 2 1/2 hours earlier than the doors open to get five of something you will never use just because "It's a deal"
2. Time is of the essence--one must strategize to get to 7 doorbuster savings in the period of 2 1/4 hours.
3. Pushing, shoving, throwing bows, tripping, cart bumping, biting, and all other forms of violence are permissable if they allow you to take out the enemy(all other shoppers)
4. Wheelchairs receive no sympathy from others until you wail them in the ankles.
5. Children can and may be used much like the front of a bulldozer.
6. Placing a person with a decoy cart a quarter mile long line while you shop for the real stuff is frowned upon by the people behind you doing the exact same thing.
And to end on a happy note...
7. You never can replace the friendships you make with the other shoppers in line even know you know they seriously are planning your take down.
Here are some rules and guidelines that can be applied when shopping on this day and this day alone :
WARNING: some actions may be punishable by penalty of law
1. It becomes ok to wait in line 2 1/2 hours earlier than the doors open to get five of something you will never use just because "It's a deal"
2. Time is of the essence--one must strategize to get to 7 doorbuster savings in the period of 2 1/4 hours.
3. Pushing, shoving, throwing bows, tripping, cart bumping, biting, and all other forms of violence are permissable if they allow you to take out the enemy(all other shoppers)
4. Wheelchairs receive no sympathy from others until you wail them in the ankles.
5. Children can and may be used much like the front of a bulldozer.
6. Placing a person with a decoy cart a quarter mile long line while you shop for the real stuff is frowned upon by the people behind you doing the exact same thing.
And to end on a happy note...
7. You never can replace the friendships you make with the other shoppers in line even know you know they seriously are planning your take down.
posted by Staci at 7:09 PM
6 Comments:
haha nice stace. I never really know how to write stace. but anyways sadly enough i've never been shopping in the day after Thanksgiving crazyness, i'm deprived.
i too belong to the deprived category but i choose that depravity as i do not understand the need to shop on that day with other crazy, insane, wierd people who feel the desire to forge through the endless mass of humanity. i prefer my couch, hot cocoa, and old movies and my cat (who yes, does talk Staci).
i, on the other hand, think that shopping on the day after thanksgiving is rediculoso...$10 off is not worth the loss or damage to an appendage nor the inherent insanity that is to come from such a choice. but to all those who are dedicated enough to face these dangers and survive...my hat is off to you.
-andrew-
Guys- if i had the choice i would be right there with all of you (inlcuding the talking cat) but its mama she just goes crazy!
Great list!
Outstanding. I am laughing out loud right now.
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